How 1 sketch opened up a whole new chapter in my life.
Lock-down was not bad for me at all.
If someone asks me to sit all day in my room, and do nothing but draw for an entire day, I would happily do so. My love for art and more importantly expressing my opinions has increased ever since the lock-down occurred.
However, this wasn’t the case from the beginning.
I was a kid who had apathy towards this subject maybe because I spent my entire time watching cartoons, nose-picking, hogging, and nothing else. Or perhaps because there was nothing that genuinely drove me towards it.
The art curriculum in my school was pretty dry, and I was shit scared of my professor. I remember him making a mockery of my classmate’s sketch because it was not pretty. Back then I didn’t give it much thought and probably joined everyone’s laugh too, but now I realize the potential of how much of an impact it might have had on that kid.
In every class, we were supposed to draw in the given sketchbook which had a set of instructions to follow. Not a fan of drawing that way. Our focus was pin-pointed on completing the drawing rather than learning how to think. And I have started to respect the ability to learn how to think and the effect different thinking approaches can make.
At the end of the year, we had to submit our sketchbook. I being me, had drawn not even a line. I had to find help, so I did what any man would do in their times of trouble.
“MUMMY !”, I shouted.
I remember her buckling down till late at night for me, and me shamelessly taking all the credit the next day.
Now being honest with you, I had barely paid attention in the class and had not bothered to make any efforts, so I can’t point a finger at anyone but still, their teaching was defective.
My intention right now is not to blame anyone but to dissect my journey so far and learn from it.
Moving on (like my ex did *sobs*)
The question is, how did this journey of giving a cold shoulder to sketching to being obsessed over it begin?
I have always had no clue about my interests/passions. It felt like such a vague and hopeless question when someone asked me what my ambition was growing up.
Though I had answers for it: Policeman, Astronaut, Chemical Engineer, Footballer, and so many more, I don’t remember them all.
These were just namesake.
This confusion intensified in college. Though my initial year was fine because I did work hard toward my newbie goals, however, I was frightened of competition and gave up on it. From there on, I spent my entire day doing nothing but avoiding this confusion. I neglected it so much and let everything else consume my attention so that I wouldn’t have to think about it anymore. I was reluctant to find an answer, I don’t know why. I declared I had no interest in anything, and started to go with the flow.
After months of wasting time, my friend put some sense into me and forced me to start trying something, instead of wasting my time. I started with a subject in my major course(Computer) but eventually lost interest in it because of overthinking. I started going back to my old habits when my friend pushed me again.
I am grateful to her.
After that. on July 4, 2020, I attempted my first sketch.
It was pretty basic, nothing fancy. But I liked it, and so did everyone with whom I had shared it. They showered me with so many compliments that I was overloaded with joy. I wanted it again, so I attempted another one. This time it was a portrait of one of my favorite actors.
Unlike last time, I watched a couple of tutorials on how to approach or draw a portrait. I followed them and learned one thing or two.
I was in my hostel, and as it was lockdown period, the majority of the students including my roommates had gone to their homes. I remember how peaceful it was to be all by myself in my room, sitting by the window and sketching while it rained out.
I kept repeating this process and creating a few more artworks until I noticed this burning desire starting to ignite in me to learn more. So, I bought a couple of courses from Udemy to help me build my skills. Practiced like a maniac. Got a mentor for me after 3 months and possibly did everything that I could do to improve.
This was 8 months after that first sketch, roughly around February.
To this day, this picture shocks me. It’s just insane for me to go all out and complete these many sketchbooks. I feel proud as a peacock just the fact that I went all out in my learning. Holy Fuck. What had happened to me? What had overtook my mind? I was in a different mindset, and not just for the sake of progress or becoming better, but to actually learn something and move forward.
Time has passed by and after almost 2 years, I am still enjoying and striving to study more. Wouldn’t claim to be a ‘Great Artist’ but yes, I have traveled miles from where I had begun and passed through many milestones, and I dig that shit.
I have learned a handful of lessons from this learning process and will be jotting them down in upcoming posts, in the hopes of using them as a tool in the future.
